working working working.

it's two twenty am.
i'm still awake and working. i'm just not done yet.
it's this education notebook. if i hadn't procrastinated...well, i'd probably still be working on some part of it. but it's just been hard for me to get my head in the game with this project. i already presented, so that is a load off of my shoulders, but i still have to make sure that everything is in this book...

ugh.

also, i had coffee today. now, if you know me, you know that i was a barista for three years and i love it and i love coffee. what you may not know is that the caffeine in coffee really messes with me. something about my anxiety or the medicine i take or just my chemical makeup says no to caffeine. and yet i drank it. so here i sit working and trying to be calm. not an easy task.

also, i'm learning that i need to relearn how to guard my heart. i just know that i am easily distracted from where the Lord would have my heart. i want to fix it. i want to be all His. heart abandoned. everything.

best advice of today: "first, i tell myself that there is no possible way any of these boys would date me. haha. but seriously it's all about taking those thoughts captive."
amen sister.